Up Until Now... What Has Stopped You

Finally, The retrospective...

Something has been occurring to me a lot recently.

“Up until now, what has stopped you from creating an online business?”

In the lead-up to what is going to be a very special AI 30-Day Challenge, I think it’s worth spending a bit of time thinking about this.

And yep, I owe you that retrospective lesson. Here it is with a twist…

Don't beat yourself up.

Guilt and Self-recrimination are the mind-killer.

(Can you tell someone is looking forward to Dune Part 2).

So, let's not do this in your head.

Your mind is not capable of this type of thinking. It's a binary memory storage unit.

Our mate, the mind sees something, and based on all the crap you have experienced, it does one of three things with the information.

99.9% of the stuff your mind “sees” it immediately dumps. It's not important to you.

For the .1%, your brain does a binary categorisation.

Good/Bad, Like/Dislike, Agree/Disagree.

Your brain does this to categorise and potentially remember the “thing” to figure out what’s really important.

Is this “thing” safe or unsafe?

It decides whether the “thing” is safe or unsafe based on all the experiences of your culture, your parents, and significant people in your life.

Ed — Where are you going with this?

One of my books of the year in 2023 was Determined by Robert M. Sapolsky.

He wrote that when humans undergo extreme trauma, their DNA changes (Neuroscientists, I know I'm not using the correct terms — Just go with me!).

If they survive the extreme trauma. The altered DNA gets passed down to the next generation and the generation after that.

So, It turns out.

Past lives matter...

I'll show myself out...

The point here is…

Your mind is a binary computer trying to figure out why you have not, until now, been able to create an online business.

The trouble is, it's dealing with a library of experiences based on your screwed-up life raised by screwed-up parents, who were also raised by screwed-up parents.

Not Ideal.

To give a personal example in another field, where up until now, I’ve been a fucktard of immense proportions.

Relationships.

Without going into the sordid details (although buy me a coffee, and I'll be happy to!). My parents (who were trying their best, and remember, they were raised by fucktards too…)

They did not model a model relationship.

This proceeded to create a “nice guy syndrome” relationship operating system I’ve been running for forty-five-odd years (and modelling to my Daughters 🥹, I, too, am a fucktard 🤦)

If I had spent as much time reading and learning and practising relationships as, say, I had on prompt engineering or copywriting, well, it's pretty safe to say I'd be less of a fucktard. My brain would have way better experiences and material to do it's a binary thing.

This has everything to do with Retrospectives and why your online business has not worked out (until now).

To use one of my favourite lines in copywriting.

“It's Not Your Fault”

However, I would add to this classic line, because you are Legends. I want you to create a great business this year.

You need to understand this…

“It is 100% your responsibility.”

But Ed - it's the past lives, the fucktards...

Yes, I know, I just wrote it.

It's still 100% your responsibility.

This concept is worth another article. 

For now, ponder it.

Let's get to the retrospective.

Finally…

Retrospective for fun and profit.

The retrospective is the single most left-out thing in the whole of Agile.

I even left it out of my Kanban for Entrepreneurs course!

The reason is simple: we don't like to see our errors, our failures, because these reflect our fears.

It makes us feel unsafe.

Unsafe = Bad (Danger Will Robinson)

That's why a well-run retrospective deftly sidesteps all of these triggering minefields to focus on the lessons and the next steps.

By shifting your position from the participant to the observer (I want you to know that as I typed that, I had a little insight explosion - wheels within wheels)

You can much more effectively and, without recrimination, conduct a retrospective.

A retrospective is much better with a group.

Like most things in life (in fact, all things, except tutoring for an exam, one-on-one is better there, and perhaps sex, but then again, who am I to judge - that might be more fun too (see above))

They don't have to be involved in the business. They are just curious and want to help. Stay reading. I have a way we are going to facilitate this.

You can do it yourself, but it is better in a small group.

Let's continue on; let's look at the retrospective structure.

I just had another Idea: I can create a GPT for you to help you with your retrospective.

This way, you'll be able to, at the very least, have a good conversation with a GPT. (Ed note - on the to-do list)

How To “Retrospective for Fun and Profit”

In this context, we will spend a few minutes generating insights from the last time you wanted to start a business.

Depending on your situation, you may have made some money or not have gotten it off the ground.

It's ok. 

Have you got the situation?

Good. 

Grab a pen and paper. 

One of the ways to get out of the mind is to “think on paper”. Doing this, you get out of your head and avoid looping and getting distracted.

And yes, for this exercise — I would prefer you write on paper rather than do the exercise on the computer.

There is a lot of research on this; for now, go with me.

The other thing you'll need is a timer of some kind.

Using a timer gives us a constraint, and constraints lead to creativity.

Let's get warmed up.

10-minute Freewrite

The rules for this exercise are straightforward.

Set a timer for 10 minutes and write, you are not allowed to stop, the pen must keep moving.

Here is a starter sentence for you;

"I'm going to take a free and easy look at the last time I went to start a business, and I'm going to take a good look at where I got to and why I stopped…"

This is a warm-up process. What you write here does not matter.

Just keep the pen moving. 

Think about the circumstances of your last attempt to start a business.

When the timer goes off, stop.

A tip: Even if you start to draw a blank, keep the pen writing, even if it's to curse me for asking you to do such a silly thing (it's not silly).

What happens (every time… if you keep the pen moving) is your brain realizes you’re serious, and you'll be surprised what pops out next.

Great 10 minutes are up, and your brain is primed and ready for the retrospective.

Mad, Sad, and Glad

Let's get to the main course of the retrospective.

The language is deliberate.

The order is essential.

Using a timer is crucial.

What Made You Mad?

We will set the timer for two minutes, and you will write down everything that made you MAD the last time you started the business.

You can use bullet points or phrases — we are going for quantity, not quality here. The more things that made you MAD, the better.

I like using Post-it notes and a Sharpie or thick pen. However, you can jot them down. Don't let a lack of Post-it notes hold you back.

Set a timer for two minutes.

GO!

As many as you possibly can.

Let's move to the next step.

What made you Sad?

Same process;

Two minutes.

Quantity not Quality

All of the very significant things that made you sad.

One for free. You're Sad it wasn't successful. Get specific about what made you Sad. Did you start out with a partner that didn't work out?

You get the idea.

Now, the last important two minutes.

What made you GLAD?

Same process. It's critical this one is last.

You are really warmed up.

It may have been a disaster. There was still some good there. You did start, for example. Even in disaster, there are little bright spots and small mercies.

I bet there are a few.

Let's go; 2 minutes.

Reflection (The Fondling)

You'll have three piles of Post-it notes or three lists.

Set a timer for five minutes, and let's fondle these insights.

Ed, WTF is up with the fondling?

It's what my mentor Gary Halbert called the process of reviewing all his research (he used 3×5 index cards — I still do this for copy projects). He would “Fondle” his cards — lay them on the floor and shuffle through them.

I have glass doors in the Legend Lair and stick the Post-it notes on them.

The Pins are looking good 😜...

It's great to do standing up. As you fondle, thoughts will occur to you; jot them down and edit the note.

Rank The Mad, Rank The Sad

Don't spend more than a minute. Rank the Mad and Sad from Most Mad/Sad to least Mad/Sad.

Don't think — feel. 

This is a quick sort.

Moving To The Preferred.

Here is a crazy idea.

Let's look at that top MAD item.

How would you prefer it to be this time?

For example;

The number one thing I was MAD about was that I could not keep my 50-minute CFTs (critical focus time) uninterrupted. I let other things distract me from them.

So to move to the preferred.

This time, I'd prefer to keep my CFT times religious. I prefer they have priority.

I really want to get into the importance of using preferred as opposed to declarative statements — like “I must” or “I will”.

For now, go with me (again) and use the phrase “I prefer”.

Do this for the Mad and Sad's.

Do the top Mad and then the top Sad.

Then do the second top mad and the second top sad.

My hunch is even acknowledging and understanding the top mad and sad will make a significant difference.

The idea is to keep the retrospective to one CFT (Critical Focus Time — A 50-minute uninterrupted work block)

This is why I want you to do this part in this order. If you get interrupted or can't finish, you've addressed the most important Mads and Sads to get the process done for the keys instead of leaving everything unfinished.

Concrete action.

Let's take that first preferred action.

What's a practical step you can take or implement?

In the example, I preferred to keep the CFT times when I scheduled them and keep them uninterrupted.

A practical step could be, to do my CFTs at the local coffee shop on the way to work to minimize the opportunity for disruption from your everyday work or home environment.

Best things.

Before you finish this retrospective, put two minutes on the clock and write about the best things from the session and key insights.

For extra credit before you get on with your day. What action could you take now to prepare to start your online business in 2024? Make sure it's action-based (not passive, like reading an article)

Let's Go Legends.

Ed

PS: Paid Legends - I’m on tour; here are the DEETS. I would love to catch up!